We have covered a lot of territory in the first four articles and I trust you find them useful. As neuroscience continues to open up, the findings around triggers for persuasion and influence have been quickly adopted in sales and marketing – and they provide untapped opportunities in fields like return to work.

In our previous articles we have seen that the case manager can begin to use some of these triggers by:

• Acknowledging a claimant and making them an ally rather than an adversary;  
• Developing and maintaining rapport in both face-to-face and phone situations;  
• Adopting effective listening skills that take no more time and in fact can allow you to respectfully interrupt when you have what you need to assist; and  
• Asking new and better questions to open up possibilities for the claimant.

Today, I want to look at those times in a return to work where there is a difference of opinion. This is the real art of case management - challenging while maintaining (or even building) rapport.

Many of us default to a win-lose model to settle a difference of opinion - something akin to the verbal boxing ring. And yet, you can influence better through agreement than through force.

This win-lose model is very limited within return to work. I have talked about the magic of rapport. If you see the claimant (or the employer, health professional etc.) as a competitor - someone to be beaten - this is the exact opposite of rapport and alignment.

It is much more elegant not to overcome force, but to align yourself with the force directed at you and guide it in a new direction. Consider changing your verbal boxing to the martial arts of tai chi or aikido.

What if you could communicate your position and never had to disagree? That’s called the agreement frame. Before we take a look, let’s quickly look at how you can create resistance through language.

No buts

Certain words and phrases create resistance. Let me give you the classic example – have you ever been on the receiving end of the word but?

Used in a sentence the word “but” negates everything that comes before it. So, “I agree but...” is really “I don’t agree”. The word “however” has much the same effect.

What does that resistance mean for the return to work process - it diminishes rapport.

Do you really understand?

Everyone comes from a different view of the world, so it takes a lot of time to truly understand another person.

That’s why I recommend avoiding the phrase “I understand” where there is a difference of opinion. Saying you understand is likely to get the person thinking “No you don’t!”

What if you could communicate your position and never had to argue?

The agreement frame wraps neatly around a negative in such a way that your communication is received in a positive light.

It consists of three phrases you can use to respect the person you're communicating with. In each case you're doing three things: building greater rapport, creating a frame of agreement and opening the door to influence the conversation without resistance.

• I AGREE … AND... (X)
• I APPRECIATE … AND... (X)
• I RESPECT … AND... (X)

In practice

Imagine a time when you are dealing with the claimant, their health professional or the employer who says “You're absolutely wrong”.

Instead of fighting back with "No, I'm not!" or “Section xx of the Act says…”, try something like this:

• I appreciate where you are coming from, and I wonder if you were to consider the steps I have worked through, if you might feel differently.

OR

• I respect your position on this, and I am curious to understand it more so that we find the best path forward.

OR

• I agree that this can feel frustrating, and I am hoping that we there may be a way to work through this together.

Talk about the wind coming out of the other person’s sails! Maybe these suggestions don’t work for you - the possibilities are endless.

Notice, you don't have to agree with the content - you can always appreciate, respect, or agree with someone's feeling about something.

You can also appreciate someone else's intent. So many times people on opposite sides of an issue don't appreciate each other's points of view, so they don't even hear each other.

With the agreement frame, you will find yourself listening more intently to what the other person is saying - and discovering new ways to appreciate people as a result.

This approach allows overall communication to remain positive; allowing the case manager to build from a place of agreement, which always supports a return to work.

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Carolyn Mounce has over 20 years experience in workers compensation – both within the regulator and agent environment. She is now the Founder and Director of Success in Life Performance Consulting and Coaching, who work with individuals and organisations developing their ability to influence through leadership, service and strategic thinking approaches.